Learn essential communication skills in this book summary of How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie was published in 1947 and sold thousands of copies, making it one of the most famous self-development books in the world
1. You can’t win an argument
The author Dale has been involved in and observed thousands of arguments. He came to the conclusion that to get the best of an argument is, avoid it altogether. Even if you win an argument, you lose. why?
Because it made the other person feel inferior and hurt their sense of pride. Ask yourself, is it really worth your time and energy trying to win an argument when it will give you nothing but a temporary sense of victory in exchange for making other people feel like crap.
There is only one way to get the best of an argument — and that is to avoid it
2. Never tell a man he is wrong
Seek their perspective & gently show the fault in it.
When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.
3. Ask questions instead of giving orders
Do this because it makes people want to cooperate with you. Finding your request as demand will make the other person angry. Therefore instead of demanding try asking for help.
Request instead of Demanding.
4. Remember Names
People love their names. Use it often in conversations to memorize them.
A person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language
Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
Recalling someone’s name shows respect for that person and their work, and indicates that you were paying attention during your previous meeting. This is some subtle, but very effective, flattery.
5. Talk in terms of other’s interests
Get them to talk about themselves & their interests. If there is anyone’s secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own.
The rare individual who unselfishly tries to serve others has an enormous advantage
The only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.
We communicate with people every day – our friends, family, partners, work colleagues, and strangers. Taking the time to learn a few awesome social skills will take you a long way in learning how to win friends and influence people.